Discussion:
Interesting Ancestral Discoveries
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David E Goldman
2017-11-28 11:29:09 UTC
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Greetings, Jewishgenners.

I was finally able to actually obtain documents going back to the 1870s and
even to 1852 from Zhitomir. One of the unusual findings was that my
great-great-grandfather (the rabbi of Mayaki near Odessa) had been married
in Zhitomir a first time at the age of 21 to a divorcee who was 26 in 1873.
I had previously obtained a record for his marriage to my
great-great-grandmother in Odessa in 1881. Of course no one in my family
ever heard about this, and it appeared extremely strange that a young 21
year old would marry an older divorced woman (who must have died or divorced
him by 1880).

Am I correct (ahem) in assuming that the only probably likelihood is as a
young religious Jew in 1873 he fell in love with a married woman who then
divorced her husband in order to marry him?

I realize this happens nowadays and could always happen, but it still seems
unusual, especially since the obvious first choice would have been a *match*
made with a young virgin and not a divorcee who is about 5 years older than
him. They then had a child in Zhitomir in 1876, whose fate is unknown.

In addition, another record shows that his own father died of an "abscess"
or "ulcer" at age 55 in 1890 (meaning his father was 17 when he was born in
1852). What might we call this illness today in 2017?

Thanks,
David Goldman
NYC
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Anita Benson
2017-11-28 19:50:47 UTC
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This sounds like a very orthodox family, and people did not in general
fall in love and just get married in these communities. I feel it must
have been a shidduch (match). These were extremely conservative
communities she would have been divorced well before being introduced
to your gg grandfather. (to avoid any scandal).

Money comes into this your gg grandfather would have been expected to
continue his learning (study at a yeshiva & later on a kollel). An
older divorced wife might have had some money in order that he could
do so. Often the women worked and the men studied, but if times were
hard or there were many children he would have to reluctantly work as
well.

regards

Anita Benson
London UK

---
On Tuesday, 28 November 2017, 11:05:30 GMT,
David E Goldman ***@verizon.net wrote:

I was finally able to actually obtain documents going back to the 1870s and
even to 1852 from Zhitomir. One of the unusual findings was that my
great-great-grandfather (the rabbi of Mayaki near Odessa) had been married
in Zhitomir a first time at the age of 21 to a divorcee who was 26 in 1873.
I had previously obtained a record for his marriage to my
great-great-grandmother in Odessa in 1881. Of course no one in my family
ever heard about this, and it appeared extremely strange that a young 21
year old would marry an older divorced woman (who must have died or divorced
him by 1880).

Am I correct (ahem) in assuming that the only probably likelihood is as a
young religious Jew in 1873 he fell in love with a married woman who then
divorced her husband in order to marry him?
...
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Mindie Kaplan
2017-11-28 23:02:03 UTC
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I agree with Anita. A rabbi would have been much more likely to marry
for money than for love, as most rabbis required more financial support
than they were able to obtain by taking in students and/or leading a
congregation. Falling "in love" with a married woman would have been
much more likely to ruin his career than it would have been to result in
her divorcing her husband to marry him! You might be able to get a
better idea of the character of your great-great-grandfather by seeing
if any "responsa" (rabbinical rulings) or references to him survive.
I'd especially be interested in seeing if he wrote anything on marriage,
divorce, shidduchim (the dating process), or earning a living. The
existence/non-existence of these writings might also give clues as to
his prominence/status within his own and surrounding communities.

Regards,
Mindie Kaplan
Gaithersburg, Maryland


----- Original Message -----
From: "Anita Benson ***@yahoo.com"
Sent: Tuesday, November 28, 2017 8:07:55 AM

This sounds like a very orthodox family, and people did not in general
fall in love and just get married in these communities. I feel it must
have been a shidduch (match). These were extremely conservative
communities she would have been divorced well before being introduced
to your gg grandfather. (to avoid any scandal).

Money comes into this your gg grandfather would have been expected to
continue his learning (study at a yeshiva & later on a kollel). An
older divorced wife might have had some money in order that he could
do so. Often the women worked and the men studied, but if times were
hard or there were many children he would have to reluctantly work as
well.
...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Watch JewishGen's video -- click here:
http://youtu.be/nASSn4rDXh4
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Planning to use Ancestry.com? Start by using the "Ancestry Search Box"
on the JewishGen homepage.
By doing this, any eventual subscription to Ancestry.com will result in
Jewishgen receiving a commission.
It's an easy way to help JewishGen!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Support JewishGen with a contribution to the JewishGen General Fund!
http://www.jewishgen.org/jewishgen-erosity/
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sign up for the JGFFAlert!
http://www.jewishgen.org/jgff/jgff-faq.html#q3.7
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Join our mailing list at http://lyris.jewishgen.org/ListManager if you
would like the convenience of receiving all soc.genealogy.jewish posts in
your mailbox, instead of having to search for them in the newsgroup, whose
content may not be consistently carried in its entirety by all providers.
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